This was originally written in June 2019.

Recently I had a dessert date with a beautiful friend. We talked and laughed and finally dove into a subject that we’re both comfortable with. It’s the one of freedom in who we are. We talked about how different our lives would have looked like had we gotten married in our early twenties. But so far we’re both still single, in our early and late thirties respectively. The subject shifted to a wonderful gal who we both know. She’s in her early twenties and has a hard decision to make. It’s regarding a relationship and she feels like if she passes it by, then she might end up in her thirties and alone. She’s acting on fear. Not on God’s promises. Believe me, I’ve been there. It’s rough. But the more you trust, the more you put faith in our Heavenly Father, the easier it will become to trust that what He has promised will come to pass.

Now, my friend and I talked about what marriage will look like for each of us now. We talked about how we’ll both be better wives because of the wait. It’s been so good (and so hard), but God in His ultimate wisdom knows best and He has brought both of us to a point of our identity being rooted in Him, not a man.

I listened to a podcast not too long ago where this lady talked about how her life has gone vastly different than that of her high school friends. This lady is single, just turned forty. She’d like to get married and possibly have a family, but her life up to this point has not gone that way. She talked about the freedom she’s found in accepting that. Well, tonight I found myself desiring to give the freedom I’ve found to the young women in my life. 

If I could tell them something it would be this: rest in God, dream, pursue, chase after the things that make your heart come alive. Those are the things that God has placed in you innately. Once you rest in the fact that your identity is found purely in Jesus, then the freedom that comes along with that is just that, pure freedom. It’s definitely a path that I never would have chosen for myself, but at this point, it’s also one that I’m not sure I’d change.

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January 2024

As I re-read this post I felt the need to share it on my blog. It was never intended to sit for years unread by anyone but me. I also saw this same friend a few months ago as we met in a city new to both of us and shared many of these same feelings. Beauty and life and unrest and grief and pain and peace, all mingled together as we walked and talked.

It is also extremely pertinent to note that I shared many of these same sentiments with a different friend this past weekend. However, the importance of everyone (not just young women) to grasp this truth and freedom in their identity in Christ is beyond anything I could write. That is my hope that this post ultimately shares with you. 

❤ Dawn